Don’t Be “That Girl”

Everyone has that one girlfriend or at least know of the girl that spoon feeds her relationship to the masses. She’s overzealous about posting and broadcasting news of every guy she dates on social sites. Pictures galore, showered with cutesy daily posts on how much fun they’re having. The satisfaction of having people chime in sending congrats messages is the confirmation needed for “That Girl.” The relationship status is euphoria and constant high for these types of Girls. I emphasize on “Girl” because they behave like adolescent school girls crushing on a guy.

The budding of a new relationship or the possibilities of an endless love will cause some females to become over anxious. The news of their relationships constantly shared with friends or anyone that asks, “How is everything going.” They can’t wait to spill the beans about their soulmate. The only thing is that this quote on quote soulmate happens to be about the tenth potential soulmate most friends meet in a five-year span. We can say these girls are hopeless romantics that keep putting themselves out there. Or, I would rather say that they are “That Girl” that puts all their energy and time into relationships with men for constant admiration from friends/family. Instead of working on personal enhancements, Growth coupled with Maturity- “That Girl” becomes obsessed in “Finding The One.”

When you have a conversation with “That Girl.” The entire conversation is plagued on her relationship with Beau. She will go through the laundry list on why this is the “One.” And, don’t forget to mention that he is so different from the other guys she dated.  But of course…it’s Not like women would date the same type of guys. Insert sarcasm…why…because we are all guilty of dating repeat offenders. “That Girl” enjoy sharing the relationship with everyone, and they truly can’t help themselves because the need for validation is higher than their self-esteem.  “That Girl” loves to go overboard in her relationship. I believe it’s done for two reasons. One is to show the people around her she’s in a happy relationship. Two, to prove to the guy she’s the one for him. These girls cannot help themselves when broadcasting their relationships. The typical posts on Facebook are always about “Me and my boo.” They are now saving wedding clippings on Pinterest. I can speak on this because I was once “That Girl.” But not to the full extent of posting my relationships on social media. I pulled the wagon before the horse in several past relationships. I knew exactly where we should get married…the name of our children…what neighborhood we would live in…down to the song we would dance at the wedding. Yes, I know…totally “That Girl” behavior.


Bianca from “Doing too Much” chapter is a lovely person but falls under “That Girl.” She would love to announce to social media about her relationship of five-plus year.  He would not allow her to post their personal status. She once had the idea of proposing to him. I’m all for girl power, but some things should be kept traditional. She decided if the boyfriend did not propose by the end of the year…she would propose to him. Bianca even purchased the ring to propose. I know…nails on the chalkboard. Her friends pleaded with her to rethink this idea. In the end, Bianca did not propose which was good. However, by doing too much as discussed in earlier part of the book, she fell under the spell of being “That Girl.”  In the end, he broke up with her to relocate to another state and is now engaged.

Sandra, discussed in “Doing too Much” chapter is plagued by being “That Girl.” Sandra has deep routed insecurities, and that causes her to make awful decisions. Every relationship Sandra was in, was displayed all over Facebook. She craved the attention from her peers and people commenting about the relationship. Because each connection was a quick crash,  it resulted in her frequently changing her Facebook profile. Side note, if you’re married or been in a long committed relationship…I don’t advise using profile pictures with significant other.  Sandra once has an ex-boyfriend that lived out of town. She would drive hours just to be with him even though her son would be displaced going on these random drives. Sometimes, Sandra would get a babysitter for the son so she could go out of town to spend time with her beau. If the ex-boyfriend were equally committed to the relationship, he would had taken the time to commute back and forth. This was a common theme in all her past relationships. Sandra would dive off a cliff if she smelled a man on the bottom that was remotely interested.


In all things, we must have God lead our footsteps. If not, we would be shifted like sheep and led astray. Now that I’m married, I can truly reminisce about the absence of God in past relationships. When God is in control, he will allow women to meet the man created for her in due time. Our timetable is not God’s timetable. He does not operate on our whelms. If we genuinely place God as the head of our life, he will bring forth more than we can imagine. Side note, stop being “That Girl.” Have an allure of mystery about your relationships until routed on the path of marriage. Some things should be kept sacred and treasured. I believe relationships are the gems to be protected from intruders.




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